Review of Beyond Gay by the Herald Sun (Melbourne)

by Paul Gray

Live and let live. That has long been the motto of gay activists -- and fair enough too.

But doesn't tolerance cut the other way too? Shouldn't there be equal tolerance and respect from gay activists towards people who hold different views from theirs about the purpose of human sexuality?

The question is worth asking in light of renewed controversy over the right of churches to speak out against homosexuality, following criticism of Sydney's Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras by leading Anglican and Catholic bishops last week.

"The annual Gay Mardi Gras is an exercise in gross exhibitionism that promotes a homosexual lifestyle, and does not merit our presence or our support," wrote Sydney Catholic Archbishop, Cardinal Edward Clancy.

Anglican Archbishop Most Rev. Harry Goodhew agreed, calling on community leaders and Christians "who might show support to the Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras, to reflect again on the values and lifestyle they are endorsing."

In the wake of the bishops' comments comments, gay criticism of the churches has hit new heights. In a speech at a Catholic school, High Court Judge Mr Justice Michael Kirby slammed the churches for contributing to "hatred and error" on homosexuality.

Another critic urged parliament to immediately enact a bill of rights to protect homosexual orientation. Isn't this an over-reaction?

Not all Christians hate homosexuals. In fact, some supporters of Christian teaching against homosexual activity are actually homosexual themselves.

Like David Morrison, a former gay activist who has recently written a remarkable book explaining his own move away from active homosexuality, Beyond Gay (Our Sunday Visitor Books).

Morrison is ITAL not END ITAL one of those US fundamentalists who tells homosexuals they can change their sexual orientation to heterosexual if they just pray and concentrate hard enough.
However, he writes a passionate and moving defence of the ideal of living chastely -- putting friendship first, above sex -- which is all the more convincing because he's lived it out himself.

Interestingly, Morrison's book shows how Christians are often their own worst enemies when it comes to debate on homosexuality. Often, they seem incapable of intelligently defending their own position -- that sexuality is a gift not to be misused.

"Most of my activist work involved writing, speaking and organizing against Christians and what was presented as the Christian position on homosexuality," Morrison writes of his gay activist days. "I succeeded many times in doing this because most people, including myself, didn't know (and still don't know) what constituted the Christian position on homosexuality.

"What we understood to be the Christian position was really little more than a caricature, an impression created in ignorance but perpetuated because it helped activists make political and social points."

After years of active homosexuality and activist lobbying, what began to turn David Morrison away from the sub-culture he had entered as a young man was a dawning belief it did not and could not provide enrichment for the whole person.

For Morrison and his homosexual partner, this realisation meant taking the hard decision not to continue having sex. This led to a year-long series of intense conversations between them -- if we're not having sex, what do we mean to each other?

In one of the most moving parts of the book, Morrison explains how this led to a mutual decision to remain "very close friends, akin to brothers."

These days, Christians are not the only ones who criticise gay exhibits.

Prominent Sydney journalist and former Mardi Gras supporter Sally Loane said this week the gay festival has become "a giant pink marketing monster, eating this city."

To redeem itself, Loane argues, the Mardi Gras needs more promotion of the human side of homosexuality -- like author Colm Toibin's recent novel, The Blackwater Lightship, a moving story about a young gay Irishman who comes home to his family to die.

Sally Loane has a point. It is through real human stories that acceptance of the homosexual person will finally be achieved by society -- not through shoving the heterosexual public's collective face in distasteful public spectacles like the Mardi Gras.

But then, as David Morrison's book shows, listening to human stories is not something we can or should do selectively. To be fair, we have to listen to ITAL everybody's END ITAL story -- even those told by people we might not want to agree with.

Are Mardi Gras' supporters ready to listen to Christians who believe, from experience, that you're better off not having sex? Let's hope tolerance has come that far.